Seasons of Change

Oh goodness. Its August.  I can't believe it's already August!  A few weeks ago I got my Senior pictures taken, and when I saw them it hit me. I thought, "Dang." Because it dawned on me all of the stuff I'm going to have to get done this year. School hasn't even started, and I am stressed out.  I'm searching far and wide for any and every scholarship, I feel like I'm swimming in summer assignments.  I'm studying for the SAT- again so that I can get a better score so that I can apply for more scholarships... I'm looking for a way to make money that won't take time away from my extracurricular activities- which will make me more well-rounded so I am more attractive to colleges...but I need the money from the job to help pay for college.  Oh and grades, once school starts I need to keep me GPA up- also for college...
*Sigh*
So anyways that's what has been going on lately.
Its kinda scary you know?
This year is going to be very different...
There will be people that I won't be seeing much anymore who are starting a new part of life...
There are friends that I've made over these past years that I will miss terribly as some go to college and as others finish high school with me.
There is so much change going on... its hard to cope.
These are times I am extremely grateful to have my faith to lean on. Without it, I don't know how I could function!  My faith is such a huge part of my life, it is what influences every decision I make.
I was talking with a good friend of mine the other day about some of the struggles I've been dealing with and she told me that there is nothing I can really do to change or stop what's going on and what I'm facing, but I can give it all up to God.
And I thought "Oh this is pretty simple!"
But I'm finding it increasingly difficult to let go. Its not as simple as it sounded at first.  There are certain things that I especially wish could happen a certain way, like,  I really really wish things could work out the way I want. And when I think about it and pray about it, sometimes I'm left asking God why things just couldn't work out that way?
"It's nothing that would lead me away from You, it would be a good thing... why can't it happen Lord?"
But then I realize that everything He puts into or takes out of my life is for my good, and to help further my relationship with Him. He knows more than anyone else what is good for me. I cannot see the big picture. I think of my life as a tapestry God is weaving together and He weaves more and more every day. I am not able to look back and see what He is doing, but I need to trust that He is making a marvelous masterpiece.  Thinking and meditating on this helps me abandon myself to His will, and His plan.
As stressful and confusing as this time may be, and as uncertain as it may be, I know it will pass.
St. Teresa of Avila says, "Let nothing perturb you, let nothing frighten you. All things pass. God does not change. Patience achieves everything."
As much as it may be difficult to live by this quote sometimes, her words provide me with comfort.
So please pray for me in this time dear readers, and I will pray for you.
God Bless!

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